Coldsnap

Praise Santa, or someone, it's snowing again! A good four inches today, and it shows no sign of stopping anytime soon. Though my roommate, ever the bummer, had to inform me the National Weather Service is predicting hot tempuratures tomorrow that will turn my winter wonderland into a slushy disappointment.

I pray he's wrong.

It's funny though how little things like the weather can effect your state of mind. Snow, ice, cold chills and northern winds bring new life and vigor into me. While everyone else is curling up, hiding by a fire and complaining about the "foul weather" and generally in a darker mood, I'm out dancing a jig, rolling around in the frozen goodness, building myself a little snow fort. I guess I never grew out of being a kid. Kids love the winter, adults don't. Makes you wonder what's wrong with Adults. Oh, they say it's just, "They like it because they'll have school off," but they like snow even when they're already on Winter Break. So take that nay sayers.

Adults just don't like to admit they forgot to have the simple joys and wonderments that kids are masters of.

But alas, when I was a child I thought childish things. And now I am a man and I am constantly pestered about it being time to put up childish things, as hard as I find that to do. Part of me still loves watching cartoons, playing in snow, the frank, open honesty you see in kids.

But as an Adult, I realize I need to work, both for money and on myself at a personal level. And this is the time toyear to think about it.

New Year's Resolutions.

I never put much stock in them myself over the years. I see someone make such a declaration, something like "I'm going to exercise and run around the block every morning", for example, only to see it put aside and forgotten a mere week, if that long, into the year.

Not even 2% through the year, and they throw in the towel. Oh yeah, New Year's Resolutions really work wonders, don't they?

But, it's the spirit, and I like to think I have more willpower than most people I know. So here it is, my list of Resolutions.

1) To be more proactive in my love life. Specifically, I would actually like to find a woman who will love me. I've had plenty of situations where I loved a woman who only had a passing interest in me. It doesn't work. I could care less what she looks like, who she is, long as I get that connection. Oh, I have my preferences, who doesn't? But it's not what's really important to me. This year I want to go out more, really look for that person. I haven't much tried it, not since Felicia, always shoving romantic relationships back in my mind. But I think the time is right in my life to start the search anew.

2) Transitioning from Just Surviving to Thriving. Right now my state of being, financially at least, is more about just making ends meet. I seldom have more than 5 bucks at the end of a month, and my current work isn't really rife for promotion and raises either. This situation leads to me being stuck where I am, I can't save up enough to actually gain any sort of venture capital for anything. I can't start my own business, which I've always dreamed of, I can't even move out of where I am. This is going to take a lot of hard work, and I'm not really sure where to start, unlike in number one above. My roommate's get rich quick schemes never really pan out, so that's not an option. The economy is lean here, and people just are not hiring. But with vilgilance hopefully something will show up.

3) Pay down my debts. Those I owe, say I owe them nothing. Friends who helped me out over lean months. A woman who runs a local charity that bought me some clothes, a man who I owe just about everything I have to, another who cuts me a deal on certain goods. I actually keep a total of the dollar figures, best as I can figure it out. Paying down my debts will cost me a total of 48,000 US dollars. They say I don't have to pay them. But when you really count it up, and see a total like that, I just can't help but feel that the debt is too large to simply ignore.


There it is, three resolutions. And ones quite a bit harder, at least to me, than "Give up smoking" or "exercise every day". But if I can keep up, if I can make some progress, it'll have much more drastic effects for me than the simple little, quickly forgotten pledges I hear made every year.

Hard work, discipline, vigilance. Those are my watchwords for the year.

And for you others who might read this, remember, America really is a land of opportunity. In 2003 I was homeless and hopeless. In 2009 I have a home, a job, a life, and I do actually believe it possible to turn this into a success. It'll be hard, but it's possible. I never had to lie, cheat, or steal, and I won't. I work hard, I behave honestly, and I'll get ahead.

I do honestly believe that. And American history has shown time and time again that it's true.


Til next time,

Grind Away